There’s a lot of talk these days about having resilience.

Do you see it as one of those traits where you either have it or you don’t?

I’ve had many chances to explore being resilient in my personal and work life. I thought it was just a matter of putting on a positive attitude and moving forward.

When I had my first kidney transplant at 15 years old I got through by focusing on getting better and trying not to burden others.

When I was laid off in 2008 I looked at the bright side that it coincided with the adoption of my daughter and I spent nine months at home with her.

When I had another kidney transplant in 2012 I focused on healing so that life with my family and career would “get back to normal.”

I see that I employed a strength of some sort and a beneficial mindset in order to keep going but it wasn’t resilience in the way I understand and practice it now.

Thrive recognizes that resilience stems from a reservoir of wellbeing that is sustainable with the use of practicable skills like: self-compassion, self-care, self awareness, acceptance, and alignment. Practicing these skills allow you to adapt to adversity and other sources of stress, be it professional or personal, in real-time.

This reminds me of the Simon Sinek quote, “People who wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable.”

I saw myself as someone who viewed the glass as half full no matter what was going on yet wondered why I was worn down as adversity kept coming at me.

I missed filling my reservoir in a sustainable way. I acknowledge that I practiced some of the skills like self-care (getting healthy) and acceptance (focus on a positive mindset and choosing steps that moved me forward) yet I neglected to keep pouring into my glass once I “conquered” the last hardship. It didn’t serve me.

Thank goodness resilience is something that can be built upon and practiced so that I navigate whatever comes my way without draining the well. This serves me.