So one day I was in a grocery store where I don’t normally shop because I heard there were good deals to be had on good quality food. By the way, I had my kiddo with me.

Things were as normal as normal can be even as we pushed the cart past the tantalizing sale bins of treats and chips and cookies without stopping and into a row that shelved foods of the gluten-free variety. It was recommended that my kiddo try going gluten-free due to some sensitivities. We looked at some gluten-free bread…some gluten-free wraps…and then it all came to a screeching halt.

We needed to leave. Immediately. “I don’t trust this store.” 

Wait, what?

“I won’t eat anything that you buy here. I don’t trust this store.”

The sentiment was repeated strongly through the produce aisle. Through the meat department. And with each utterance my patience waned and bewilderment, frustration, and anger grew.

“Sweetheart,” my line of questioning to understand the change of heart began, “ what do you mean you don’t trust this store? The types of foods and brands of food that I buy here are the same as what I buy from other stores and you eat that.”

At this point, even though I KNEW that the rational thinking part of my kiddo’s brain was not “online,” I kept trying to figure it all out at face value. In my gut I KNEW that this was something bigger…something heavier.

I wanted to bolt. I wanted to leave my half-filled cart in the aisle and get out of there but I didn’t. I set my boundary that we were staying and finishing the errand. I set my expectation that the food purchased here would be eaten. I collected my simmering frustration and anger and ran it through my Inner Truth filter of love and stayed present. I felt my patience come back. I felt compassion for whatever was going on in my kiddo’s H-IOS (Human Internal Operating System).

I stayed with my child through the illogical thoughts, unsettling emotions and confusing behavior. I stayed in aisle 21.

Guess what happened next?…my kiddo cleaned it all up in aisle 21!

Somehow (I believe through some gosh-darn good modeling and influence) my kiddo cleaned that H-IOS right up in aisle 21.

Because we stayed with the heavier and confusing feelings, thoughts, desires and behaviors in the grocery store we both were able to be present and process what was really going on.

Turns out what was showing up was fear of failure, fear of not liking a new way of eating, fear of change, and fear of the unknown. All normal human stuff!

Once we understood what was really going on we could address how to move forward.

I was able to turn down my fear…(of what I don’t know exactly…maybe fear of spoiled, uneaten food that I purchased…maybe wasted time? No. It was definitely fear of failure to support my kiddo when it was needed most)…and tune into love. Connecting my thoughts, emotions, behaviors and desire components to my Inner Truth allowed me to cleanup my H-IOS in aisle 21 too.

So what do you want to cleanup?

First, I invite you to accept that you are feeling heavier things and stay with the heavy instead of squashing or deflecting it. At the same time, trust that you will be ok staying with these heavier thoughts and feelings because you have made it this far in life! You have experienced lots of difficult situations, experiences, relationships, feelings, and thoughts and you have made it through! I know that because you are reading these words.

Once you are ready to process the heavy, ask yourself “Is that what it really is?”

If yes, cool. I then invite you to ask “Is it true? How is it serving me? What is it showing me? How do I want to move it forward?”

If no, trust yourself to sit with the heavy some more until you find the root of it.

Remember, thoughts are just thoughts and emotions are messengers of how we are experiencing life in the moment. These messengers can illuminate new understandings, highlight opportunities for growth and allow us to create roadmaps to move forward. 

Although it may not feel like it at the time, spending time with the heavier things will actually allow you to experience life with more happiness and more fullness in the long-run. Becoming proficient in aligning your H-IOS allows you to experience life the way that you want regardless of the aisle or the grocery store in which you find yourself.